What do you do when you have an exam in two days and cannot, for the life of you, get yourself to study? What do you do when you stare deep into your book and all you see is a random blur of nothingness .. ? When the past comes flashing back .. with yet another depressing possibility.. what can you do to blot out the forgotten images from your mind..?
It’s been so long .. yet, every grimace of pain - on a face I don’t even recognize, every cause for sorrow - that doesn’t even concern me, instantly redirects me to you. And it’s yesterday once more .. every time - the same panicked helplessness .. the hoping against hope .. and the overwhelming defeat in the end. It’s almost as if I find you in sadness, only to lose you again to the cruel joke that people call Destiny.
Hah! Algorithms do not stand a chance when silent screams and tears of agony fill every crevice of your broken mind. And you try, in vain, to pick up the pieces and move on .. hoping that some day somebody will find the fallen fragments , follow them to you and make you whole again.
Losing you was never an option and living without you, never a possibility. Life .. how it changes everything. After all, I’m right here .. studying things I don’t care about, appearing for exams that do not matter, trying to forget the memories I can’t do without.
Sometimes we all try to forget the memories, and somehow we remember them more in attempt to do so...sometimes all we care about is moving into the past, things that used to matter once so intensely...
ReplyDelete"It’s almost as if I find you in sadness, only to lose you again to the cruel joke that people call Destiny" - so true!
*tight hugs*
How I wish you were here + I wanna read more of your posts, beautiful words indeed.
Love
:) I love you.
ReplyDeletelove you too..:*
ReplyDelete:) any thoughts about the renovation of the blog? :P
ReplyDeleteSometimes trying to forget people doesn't work. Maybe it's best for us to remember them, the way they were. I think one day will come when we all will look up in the sky, smile and say, the world is fair. No matter how much it troubles us, all the sufferings are worth that moment.
ReplyDeleteKeep smiling. :)
I know :) But I seriously doubt if I'll ever agree with the "world is fair" part though!
ReplyDeleteAtleast it feels good to hope that way! :)
ReplyDeleteBut then false hopes aren't necessarily the best things to dwell on! :)
ReplyDeleteuff...it's really tough to win arguments with you, seriously. :( :(
ReplyDeletehaha .. even then you must always try! :P
ReplyDeleteand thanks btw :)
:P
ReplyDeleteAnytime. :)
:) :)
ReplyDelete*superlike* :) :)
ReplyDelete*happy purr* :)
ReplyDeleteyou are amazing "The girl in the mirror" :P
ReplyDeleteThank you! :)
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